When I first started my healing journey I totally struggled with change, and at times I still do.

But in the beginning, I found it SOOO difficult to embrace or even think of change.

After years of coaching many clients, I have found it to be quite common.

A client of mine recently went through this and has allowed me to share in the hope that it helps another. This client of mine, who we will call Sally for privacy reasons.

We were chatting about the challenges she had around the idea of change. How she was toing and froing with the idea of welcoming changes to her life, but she always fell back into the belief ‘I don’t have the energy or time to make changes, it all seems too hard basket’, even though she felt stagnant and not progressing in life, it was too overwhelming for her to make changes.

Relate?

The idea of change can be an easy progression for some but can be daunting for many.

How so?

We as humans get a sense of security from routines and life, as we know it, are mini routines wrapped up in one big routine, this creates a bubble of safety and security.

If you look at small children, as an example, when they are out of routine they generally react in different ways. It’s unfamiliar, not predictable, and can lead to a feeling of discomfort. Some children adapt easily, and some take a little longer to adjust.

This is the same for adults, when we are out of routine, we can tend to feel frazzled, overwhelmed, unsure. Or you might strive on the free flow.

Sally would go straight into emotional overwhelm at the mention of change. Throughout our sessions, even though she was resisting SO much throughout the sessions, Sally was brave and explored her reactions to the idea of change.

What came up for her was around the language she was using, such as “I don’t have time to do other things. I’m so tired with the kids, that by the time the day is out, all I want to do is fall into bed!”

Her favourite saying was…. “I can’t change!”

All these were blockers/ stories which she kept repeatedly saying to herself, which meant she believed it. Because, when you speak it, you believe it and you live by it!

This was the clear sign for us to dive deeper into her emotional layers. The further we went, Sally identified how UNHAPPY she was. She didn’t like her job, her marriage was suffering, she didn’t like how people treated her.

But on the inside, she longed for SO much more!

*She wanted to go for her dream job

*To have laughter back in her life

*To feel connected with her husband

I asked her to describe to me what her current reality feels like to her, she said it’s like an old dress she wore as a teenager. Back then, it fitted beautifully in all the right places and felt incredible. But now at middle age after kids, she can still sort of squeeze into it but knows that it’s all wrong.. it isn’t flattering. It’s very difficult to wear.

And it was right there- BOOM! Squeezing into what once was and suited perfectly then, but not so much now. AHA-MOMENT!!!

She knew that her current reality wasn’t working with her, it wasn’t complimenting her life anymore. The more we talked, she realised that it wasn’t the idea or thought of change, but the process of it that makes it scary.

WOW!

See babe, when you have been doing something for years, it becomes a habit. To switch it up can feel overwhelming, scary, uncertain, all feelings that make your brain go “NO! STOP!”

Yet deep down you want to change, but what's actually putting the brakes on, is not having a clear path or next step of direction.

And like Sally, your clear path may be blurred out and overrun by overwhelming emotions.

If this is you, I have great news! I am going to share the quickest, easiest way to cut out your emotional overwhelm, so you can get the answers.

The quickest way to cut out the emotional overwhelm is to ask yourself these 2 questions

1) What do I want?

2) How am I going to get it?

Let's look at Sally's as an example....

Sally wanted:

· To go for her dream job

· To have laughter back in her life

· To feel connected with her husband again

She already knew what she wanted and by asking herself “how am I going to get it?” gave herself clear instructions on ways to come up with how to get it.

* Build and flex her inner- confidence muscle, get her finances in check - take her leap and GO for her dream job

* Make time for her and do more of the things that make her happy

* Book special 'love' dates on the calendar for her and her husband to spend time as a couple. To be present and playful with each other.

The answers came instantly flowing out of her. Because she knew deep down that she was ready, it was the 'how' that was keeping her stuck.

Tony Robbins says “If you’re not growing, you’re dying”

And that’s exactly how Sally was feeling.

So babe, if/ when you are feeling stuck, I encourage you to ask yourself those 2 questions.

And then start taking the actionable steps towards what you want.

You are worth to have the life you have always wanted

Xx